I'm not sure how it is now. How different I've become. The world has become strange to me. How unnoticed I feel from it. I still try & have a spec of hope. Not sure why. People wiser than I have said to save a spec. No ones said that. I feel I was dropped into a world I'll never understand and most live out my days in it. Music makes sense. People don't. I like music cause it honest. As little as I know about music, I know volumes compared to people. Which is odd.
We seem to have that bridge but only that one. Listening to people talk. Subjectively. It's madding. How many more time can I stand the word literally before I loss my mind and have a brain aneurism? Theories of why this happened and how to deal with it are endless & therefore pointless to spend my time on. So I go back to music. Where it's safe. Where there's still something wondrous left in the world. Lately, it feels as though that dwindles the more & more I analyze. That's what I do now. I don't experience it any more.... I'm working on that. One could say it because the lack of a muse. As easy, romantic and again, easy to say its not my fault, I won't do that. A the end of the day, any day I pick up the guitar, it just needs to be there. And it's just not. After all this time it's not. Makes me wonder...
Music I get. People I don't.
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